Right so my reason for my being late is actually valid this week, I had technical difficulties in the way that my Internet shut itself off. I hope that you have also noticed the other technical change on my blog, my 'blogger navigation bar' has gone, see I'm clever like that. Firstly I would like to thank you for all of your helpful suggestions on my facebook page, or not as the case may be. I have to say, little bit disappointed with the amount of people who have liked the page, I have over 300 friends (facebook not actual friends) and a grand total of 30 have liked. I hate you. I might stop.
But I won't because I want something to stick on my CV and I like hearing your (good fans) praises every week.
Anyway so regular readers will know that last week I promised to write about something fashion related, actually do what it says on the tin for once. An obvious choice would be to completely regurgitate what every magazine has said about s/s12, which I will be quite happy to do once I am editor of ELLE and I will have the exclusive, but I figured that wouldn't be very interesting now.
The other day I realised something. This time next year I will be in my last year of uni. I will have a grand total of 5 months of education left in my life, and after that I will have to step out into the great big wide world and offer up my services as a sulky cynical journalist. When I was little my estimations of when you become a grown up is when you leave uni and get a job. If my estimations remain correct I haven't got too long to go. Does this mean I need to start growing up? And, heaven forbid, my wardrobe does too?
(It's not fair. Peter will get to wear his tunic top and green leggings forever.)
One of the fashion's deadliest sins is 'mutton dressed as lamb', it even says in the fashion bible 'thou shalt not bear false garments for thoust age' (it doesn't say that pretty sure there isn't a fashion bible, do correct me if I'm wrong.) I would like to think I'm not quite mutton yet but as Stevie Nicks would say 'I'm getting older too.'
At news years eve, dressed in star patterned tights, a rainbow star bangle, lightening bolt earrings, a Minnie mouse t-shirt and glittery shoes that Dorothy would envy, I wouldn't have looked out of place stood next to Ant and Dec on SMTV Live as a children's TV presenter. (I was gonna go for a more current children's TV program but I thought it wouldn't wash as well, plus who doesn't love Ant and Dec?)
(not far off my new years eve outfit of choice.)
What does that say about me? Either that I have the sophistication of Hannah Montana (don't get me wrong I love her but that girl is a big hit on the Disney Channel not ELLE and I'm really not hoping to attract the likes of Nick Jonas!) or that maybe the prospect of growing up is scaring me back in to some preadolescence clothing to soften the blow. So when it comes to fashion how do you age gracefully?
(maybe someone should tell Hannah that she can't actually be Hannah Montana forever because one day her grey hairs will peak out from under her wig and she'll have to pick the kids up from school.)
I recently had an ELLE binge (i.e. I read it cover to cover.) I rarely have these now because of lack of funds to buy a magazine when I would frankly rather have a rum and coke. It seems I need to binge more often as I was quite in the dark about current trends (pretty slack seeing as I'm meant to be a fashion blogger.) I had been aware of the a/w 11 'mad men' trends, of sweeping skirts past the knee and a 60's finish. But I was unaware that this trend had carried on into present day wear what with Prada's suburban 50's look meaning I don't have to shave above my knee.
(I now understand how these ladies can afford Prada, they save so much money by not having to buy Venus razors!)
As you will have all noticed I'm sure, I am not the best figure head of the knee length skirt. I always try and defend my cheek-y length skirts by blaming it on my height, but who am I kidding probably a little bit slutty (just a little I don't want any smart Alec comments here.) So now that I'm no longer a hormonal teenager trying to get guys to buy an underage girl an apple sour and lemonade perhaps I should adopt a new skirt length and a new style?
I always thought I would, eventually stop flirting with Primark playsuits and go into a more serious relationship with a Reiss trouser suit, but when's the cut off point? When's the defining moment when you say enough is enough put down your rum and coke, slip off your body con belt (and put something else on hopefully) and grow up.
I think for a lot of people that would be when you have kids, but for me the idea of me and a baby makes as much sense as vinegar and milk, we would just curdle. I wanna make myself a fantastic career to feed my rum habits and leave the serious stuff for later. I want to wear stupid short sparkly dresses that are impossible to wash for as long as I possibly can, because one day my button will pop on my jeans and I will have missed that chance.
(frankly I'd rather have another pair of shoes.)
I've been thinking that yeah the fashion industry is telling us to wear these retro grown up looking clothes, but if you think about it they're doing exactly the same thing that I'm doing, reaching back into the past because they're too scared to grown up and face their future. They're probably exactly where I'm gonna be in ten years, alone, alcoholic, baby-less, career driven maniac who's realising they're a little too old for bunker.
As for knowing when to stop wearing skirts up round your midriff, I think you can pretty much define it whenever you get pregnant or have you first serious job or something like that, unless of course you got that job from sleeping with the boss in which case you should probably keep on wearing that skirt.
(well it worked for Bridge)
And if you're like me and feeling a little bit like your futures creeping up on yer, here's a little bit of advice from a woman who has the job I want;
"I was a giddy creature who survived on thin air and no sleep. Being a well dressed woman on the edge suited me. Now I'm a vitamin popping, organic-eating soon-to-be momma, happy as can be with the world's most patient man. I'm living proof that things work out in the end. I've kissed a lot of Muppets to find my man and made many mistakes...My advice? Don't date rock stars, married or gay men (if he's all three, run away. Fast.)... Pay a visit to net-a-porter, you'll worry more about the credit card bill arriving than the fact he left you for someone younger. The 'drinking-until-you-fall-over' method is a good method of getting over boys-as a one-off...Take it from me it will all work out in the end. Never dye your hair to match your pet. Be true to your individual style and don't let money get in the way of a good outfit or the truth in the way of a good story."
- ELLE's columnist, Mademoiselle, she sucks yeah? No she doesn't. I wish she did.
Whenever I feel unsure or worried I think about that. It will work out in the end. It's like when you order a new outfit and it doesn't look quite how you thought, you learn to live with it anyway.
And I don't hate you I love you, please keep reading my blog so my future does turn out OK.
Last but not least, the blog that I did a guest post for has been nominated for the Marie Claire blog awards. It would be great if you could give it a vote, as both the editor and I would really appreciate it, if your gonna vote for anyone vote for chic and cheerful here- http://www.marieclaire.co.uk/news/fashion/533781/vote-now-best-fashion-blog-and-twitter-feed.html
See you next week bunnies, on Thursday not Friday, Thursday.
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