The real Gok Shock

So as Gok's fashion roadshow comes to a close I left no longer craving the same amount of Gok that I used to...
I am feeling slightly over exposed to him, slightly worn down and (shockingly) growing increasingly irritated with him. Like when you've moved past the honeymoon stage of your relationship  and neither of you bother making the effort any more (yep those new look trackies came out again.) He doesn't bother trying to win me over any more and I don't bother to try and let him.


Why is this? Is it because I have seen him live twice in the space of 6 months and I feel like we should take a break? OR (heaven forbid) am I ready to dump Gok?


Don't get me wrong I am a real Gok lover (what straight woman isn't?) But this series he just wasn't doing it for me. I used to love the way Gok made me feel about fashion, like I was in on a secret, like it was just me who knew all these expertise but then I had a revelation....


I was sat watching Gok religiously as I alwayyyyssss do! It came to the point where he helps random members of the public (you know the part when a mass of fashion starved women bring a jumble sale worth of their clothes to swap with other women) anyway he started getting to grips with an apple shaped women when to my horror my flat mate, my male straight flat mate, said "add a belt."
"I'm sorry?!"
"It's the same every week" he said "'oooh she's a apple! add a belt'"


How was this possible? My straight male flat mate knew the secret! Was he right? Is Gok now that predictable that his style bible is now as mundane and predictable as fat face?

I also began to notice that he's picked up his game. One of the reasons why I adored watching Gok in the past was waiting for him to wreck an outfit by adding 6 different scarves or bizarre hat that he's made out of a bin lid. And I would love when you got to the end of the show and it would be his collection against Brix and his collection would stick out like a sore thumb and you would feel so gratified and clever that you could spot which collection was what. Not so much this season, he's gotten too good. And I don't like it.

 (See this is the kind of bizarre outfit that the Gok that I know and love would produce.)

So what to do? Well I love Gok too much to completely give up on him. I think we just need some time apart. I know I moan Gok but it would mean the world if you could whack out your gloves and scarves for every outfit again? Ta.

"What the f**k is up with these models?"

OK verrrryyyyyyy long time no speak... almost a year. I feel as though me and fashion have been on some needless break and I have been slobbing around eating ice cream and wearing new look trackies only to find that actually we still feel exactly the same way about each other and there was no need for me and fashion to split.

anywayyy....
So exactly this time last week I was getting myself allll excited for watching the model agency on chanel 4 (because I love a bitchy fashion show, don't you?) and I roped in several of my flat mates to come and watch it with me. I was sat there blissfully unaware of their gradually wrinkled noses when all of a sudden one said "What the f**k is up with these models?!" I stared blankly at her. She went on to express her outrage at the way the models look, "really f**king ugly!" one of the agencies employees went on to say how they wanted models to look as though they were from another planet.

"See, SEE!" she said, "they want them all to look like aliens! why would you want a model to look like an alien?!"

I thought about this. Did my outraged flatmate have a point? Now that I think about it a lot of models do just look bizarre, if you think about the likes of Lily Cole with her extrordinarily small face or Lara Stone with her HUGE gap tooth, why would you want them to be the face of fashion?

The more I thought about it the more I could not come to a conclusion. (I seriously considered finding my new look trackies.) Why wouldn't you choose a normal beautiful girl with whom an audience can relate?!
BANG.... it hit me
Designers do not want their clothes to look accesible, they don't want any girl to be able to wear them. They want their clothes to be the most out of this world thing, so unatainable and aspirational that they look like they've fallen from a strange planet, hence the alien like models.

I did have one other, slightly more boring theory that would be far harder to blog about, that models simply acted as clothes rails which is why they're so skinny, but then they could just send clothes rails down the catwalk and that's just silly...